POWER RANKING NUMBER FIVE, SPONSORED BY MAMBA

 

Ladies and gentlemen, this is power rankings number five

One, two, three, four, five, tmoney big on Carr
With Jalen Hurts on bye, are some picks in store for a Kansas City corner?
Coach Bailey he got some winning juice
But Matty don't wanna, be a bust like he was last week
Beats by Rhamondre keep, because well, bless Malik
Guys like Abolafia, Sam-ela, Andrew can teeter
Fantasy continues, who knows if they’re compete-ers
So what can Ky do, after a really big score by Staffords
Coach B is flirting with the top spot, he thinks it’s time
Score’s all good for Alan to pump it, Stephen came in to trump it

A little bit of Kamara helps Cobra Ky, a little bit of hysteria without Rice
A little bit of Cheetah is all Jess needs, a little bit of QB tweeners is what he sees
A little bit of Sammer’s Andy Dalton, a little bit of scary Drake London
A little bit of Skinner lower than Sam
A little bit of Koo kicks three for Alan

Power ranking number five

Don’s up, Sam’s down, will Alan keep the crown
Shakir heads up Allen-town, but will it lead to touchdowns
Nine weeks left so it’s all right
If you’re towards the front and not facing 0-5
Some have won once and some of won twice
And if you’ve won thrice, then you’re doing something right

A little bit of Don is a on the rise, a little bit of Jessica starting to slide
A little bit of D’Aguiar at win three, a little bit of Skinner…lucky 13
A little bit of withstanding from Greg Johnson, a little bit of Rhamondre fumblin’ on
A little bit of Abolafia right near Sam
Will a little bit of Goff overtake Alan

Trumpet, the trumpet
Power ranking number five

A little bit of Vedder scoring highs, a little bit of Kyler not so fine
A little bit of four spot for Coach B, a little bit of ten spot for Feeny
A little bit of Alan losin’ one, a little bit of Willie standing strong
A little bit of Matty hopin on Lamb
A little bit of Ogunbowale might be Neil’s plan

Who will fall for all to see, Love-Jones could keep Don on the move
Who will make a run and who just steps a side
Play and see who gonna touch the sky

Power ranking number five

Power Ranking Number Five, brought to you by Mamba

Mamba, "We're Different Here"

14) Dark Mondays (0-4, PR: 14)- Hey, at least they topped 100, which is nice.

13) I spent money on this? (2-2, PR:10)- After a very strong week one, this team has been not so good, sitting 10th in points scored over the past three weeks. Silver lining is they are still at .500, so that is neat.

12) Sam and the Mitchells (1-3, PR:11)- Week three was good, but weak-ly is how this team has performed in the other three weeks. 

11) GTFeens (1-3, PR:12)- And they are in the win column! A win this week and that's two in a row...another win in week six and that's a winning streak. The tide could be turnin' and it could be more like GTFiends...of winning. Okay, just forget that last part.

10) Daniel Jones' Diary (2-2, PR: 13)- All of sudden here comes Daniel Jones' Diary thundering up Power Ranking Number Five, brought to you by Mamba.

9) Hurts Carr Rental (2-2, PR:6)- The emphasis is definitely on the Hurts part of the name, right now. Two straight losses and week five doesn't look to be so great either. Plus with Jalen Hurts on bye who's gonna get this team its weekly quote of turnovers?

8) Weakened Warriors (2-2, PR:4)- Not gonna sugarcoat things, The Weakened Warriors are living up to their name, with not only back-to-back losses, but the second fewest points in the league over those two weeks. I think Matty is handling it well, though.

7) Team Johnson (2-2, PR:9)- Despite having the 3rd fewest point over the past two weeks, this team was able to still get one win on that stretch. Is two games considered a stretch? Unimportant. Basically, we're saying he was lucky...Johnson... in one of those games. 

6) Beats by Rhaomondre (3-1, PR:7)- After two top three weeks, Beats came back down to Earth in week four, but still managed a win. Will a Nabers absence in week five snap the three-game winning streak? 

5) Team jeleefish (2-2, PR: 3)- Let's see, win, loss, win, loss...that means this week is a gonna be a win, right? Not my first pattern solved, so...

4) Team CoachB5353 (3-1, PR: 8)- The biggest riser of the week and just rarin' to keep on goin'!

3) Unnecessary Ruffians (2-2, PR:1)- The team is still good, but gotta give the credit where credit is due, so despite a good week, had to scooch 'em back to the team that dominated not just this team, but the whole league, last week.

2) Cobra Kyler (3-1, PR:2)- Fourth in points last week whilst losing Rashee Rice (which is totally not a concern) is pretty decent...now let's see if this team can now overcome that gaping hole in the lineup.

1) Inglorious Staffords (3-1, PR: 4)- Wow, what a week! The points just kept a coming and then Goff caps it off by catching a touchdown?!

The Fruitopia Matchup of the Week is Beats by Rhamondre vs Team jeleefish. Can Beats extened the winning streak to four? Will jeleefish work back into the top four?! You'll have to wait and see! 

Good luck all! See ya next week!